Should you approach the guy you like?

01 February 2013


Photo via Pinterest.


You meet a cute and hot guy in a pub... should you approach him or wait for him to come to you?

A cute guy is seated next to you in a bus... should you strike a conversation?

Let's be honest ladies... this is a million dollar question and all of us has asked this question at some point in our life.

My take on this is... just go for it...


1. There's really nothing to lose.

The only thing that's stopping you from making the first move is the fear of rejection.

2. You probably won't be seeing him again.

So... what if something beautiful results from you making the first move? Even if nothing happens, it's an experience and a sure way of getting out of your comfort zone.

3. If you don't do it, you'll probably have to live with ... "I should have"... "what if..."

Live life with no regrets and just have fun!

The other thing that's really stopping you from expressing yourself is the all the "rules" society has for women. Women should never make the first move first, because that would make us look cheap. Women should never say I LOVE you first, because that would mean we're desperate.

Don't you think with all these unspoken rules, it puts a lot of pressure on the men too?  Because of all these "rules", men have to measure up and thus have to cover up their fears.

I personally think, if there's a guy you really like and would like to see more of, there's really no harm making the first move. The question, is can you do it tastefully without looking desperate.  If you come from a needy and desperate place, the guy can feel it too.

Here's what I suggest you do:

1. Before you go up to the guy, ask yourself if you would regret not talking to him after you leave the place. If yes then...

2. Observe him for a while and sense his energy and your energy. (Remember, there's no hurry!... You're not looking for your partner right now. You're just having fun and want to make new friends).

3. Get his eye contact and smile for 30 secs. At this point,
  • he'll either smile and continue with what he's doing. If he does that, you get the point? He's not that into you.
  • if he smiles and maintains eye contact, wait for him to approach you. Men sometimes need some kind of sign before he makes his first move. Remember he has his own fears too.
4. Wait for him to walk over and let him start the conversation first. You've already done your part. Now sit back and let him do the work.  

5. Just be yourself and be interested in him. Don't start yaking about yourself.

6. If he wants to see you again, he'll ask for your number. So you don't have to worry about it. But you can kinda drop hints that you'll like to see him again. 
(If he doesn't ask for your number.... he's not that into you so... NEXT!)

If you follow these steps, you don't need to join any dating agency... the world is your oyster and there're plenty of opportunities to meet MEN. All you need to do is to have some courage and get out of your comfort zone. And all it takes from you is..... SMILE.....


© Elyse-Anne - The Love Coach for Successful Single Women | Relationship expert for All Women

Post a Comment

Latest Instagrams

© Purposely Love by Elyse-Anne. Design by FCD.