What Happens to LOVE after Marriage?

03 December 2012

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Ever heard of the saying the grass is greener on the other side? While single women are trying hard to get themselves attached, married women are trying hard to make sense of their life after marriage and children.

I'm with my husband for almost 10 years now and I can tell you for sure it's been a hell of a roller coster ride. No one told me after the lust and infatuation is over, we need to work on compromise, responsibility, finance management...... Our relationship has been from start up --> break up --> make up.  Trust me! We were on a verge of divorce many times! Read more about my story here.

What happens to that initial "LOVE HIGH" when you first met?  You can literally survive on sunshine and fresh air, you jump out of bed every day with only 1 hour of sleep because you were on the phone with him the entire night. Remember times like this?

Well, guess what? This "LOVE HIGH" dies and fades of after 6 months and after that what seems quirkily cute to you may annoy you!  This "LOVE High" gives you the same effect as a person who is high on cocaine and therefore... YES! It's addictive!

It's easy to attract your true love to you but it's not easy to maintain the relationship till death do you part!  Look around you and observe the married people.  Are they really happy with their lives just because they are married?  Truthfully, the best part of the marriage is the day you get married. YOUR WEDDING DAY! Reality hits after that!

What really happens after marriage? Suddenly that fizz is gone, no more going out on expensive dates, football seems to be more important, he stops coming over to open the door for you when you get out the car, he complains that you spend too much time on dressing up...... no more calls during the day... there's nothing to talk about.... 

To make the marriage work, it's no longer just a dream or a fantasy idea where princesses live happily ever after. A lot of work needs to be put in to make this relationship work. I don't believe in failed relationships, people just quit and give up on themselves. 

It's a two way traffic and it takes both hands to clap doesn't it?  If a marriage fails, both parties are at fault. Someone gave up along the way. Either that or you are focusing on what YOU WANT and you are putting your needs above your relationship. 

This is the reality! Are you ready for this?

What is the recipe for a successful marriage?

Not the 5 Cs people are talking about. 
- Cash
- Credit card
- Country club
- Car
- Condominium

- Communication
- Commitment
- Compassion
- Care
- Concern

Just because you are married, doesn't mean your spouse can read your mind. So don't EXPECT him to know what you are thinking about by keeping quiet. Men operate on a different frequency.

I recommend that you get the book 5 languages of LOVE by Gary Chapman.  It's an easy book to read and very interesting so even if you're not that into reading, you'll enjoy it.

Marriage is more that just two people who are in love getting together.  It's not about manipulation or power struggle. Really its about being together so that you can be better people and support one another in each other's growth and development so that you both can reach your maximum potential.

Now, what do you think of that?

Meet Elyse The LOVE Coach for women

ImageElyse is Singapore's Leading LOVE coach for Successful Single women from www.PurposelyInLove.com.  She is a Love Attraction Expert and also known as the "Queen of Love Transformations ". She specializes in helping single women who struggles to attract amazing men who will rock their world to Attract their TRUE LOVE in 90 days and get a love life the easy and painless way by showing them why they are stuck and experiencing blocks with love and help clear them pretty quickly.  

Because of this her clients get proven, undiluted and specific step by step instruction on how to get over their exs, attract men they really want and not who they get without looking desperate and feeling needy. No more mind games. No more conforming to society "rules". Her clients usually experience an A-HA moment in  just 1 session. 

She believes that it's every woman's ultimate goal to love and be loved and live a purposeful life.  When a woman experiences and gets the love she desires, she is able to create miracles in her life. She becomes an alchemist. On the other hand, when a woman's life is blocked in love, it affects every area of her life.  She literally shuts down and experiences struggles in every area of her life.

"Love life and live life the way you want it!" ~ Elyse-Anne

© Elyse-anne - The Love Coach for Successful Single Women | Relationship expert for All Women

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